Dublin has a burgeoning café scene, with enough choice for anyone to find somewhere to feel at home in, and after all, what is a café but home with someone else making the sandwiches? Other than your ma. From the bohemian chic of Café Irie and Gruel, to the commercialism and luxury(-ish) of Starbucks and Butlers Chocolate Café, the full spectrum of Dublin’s cafés are united by one central characteristic: they are all cripplingly expensive.

Anyway, for all you lovely people with more money than sense here’s Jackdaw Fool’s guide to Dublin’s cafés.

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I smiled and pointed toward the salads.

‘I’m sorry sir, this is a vegetarian restaurant.’

‘Meeeat.’

‘We do have a fine selection of cheese steaks.’

‘Meeeat.’

This guy was serious, he wanted his meat.

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